Psycho Music

In case you’ve ever wondered what kind of nutjob would like the “music” of Justin Bieber, you need wonder no longer. It’s been scientifically proven that “artists” (cracks me up every time) like Bieber, Eminem, JayZ, and their ilk are the favorite of the mentally ill.

In a recent study at NYU, two researchers tried to find a correlation between music and psycopathy, and the results were not exactly shocking. Of course, one of the problems with the study is that the surveyed group consisted entirely of psychology students, and if you’ve ever gone to college, you know that most psychology students are a bit tweaked upstairs. Other than that, the results appear to be accurate.

It does leave one unanswered question: If one accidentally listens to the aforementioned craptists, does one become a sociopath? I would venture to guess no, because any sane person would do everthing within their power to escape the assault on their cerebrum by reacting in the most basic form of auto-self defense.

The Guantanamo prisoners were subjected to endless Bieber in a vain attempt to make their stay a displeasurable one, but more than likely the psycho terrorists enjoyed this part of their captivity. I wouldn’t be surprised to one day see some jihadi atop a technical with Bieber’s mug proudly displayed on his shirt.

Naturally, Pitbull owners are also big on Eminem, since they’re the perfect sociopaths.

I bet Harvey Weinstein has been to more than a few shows and probably had a sex mp3 list with the worst on the list. Matt Lauer? Yup, he’s a belieber.

At least I can find solace in my musical tastes and know there is one less negative influence in my life, and that my perfect sanity is underscored.

Now get out there and put some Allman Brothers on and enjoy some beauty in your life today.


Social Justice Welchers

Ahh, you’re so proud of your new iPhone and iMac, and you just can’t wait to get online and preach about making the rich pay their fare share.

Even Tim Cook, the CEO of Apple is constantly wailing about social responsibility and the need for equity in all things, particularly income equality.

Apple moved $250 BILLION overseas in order to avoid paying taxes. You know, those important funds that pay for social services such as Medicare, Social Security and roads.  While they wrap themselves in the social justice flag, they work tirelessly behind the scenes to stash as much cash as possible and deny the funds that could have a very positive effect on the lives of millions of people.

You shouldn’t be surprised at this, since their lack of philanthropy is legend. Steve Jobs was quite possibly the stingiest, greediest person this country has ever produced. He openly disdained almost everyone and did his best keep every last penny he could squeeze from the myrmidons of the market.

He created this corporate culture that has survived beyond his passing, and it shows no sign of changing.

Buying an Apple product just might make you a loathsome person worthy of protesting. Look in the mirror, slap yourself, and return your Apple products. If they change their hypocritical ways, maybe they can bring back the trust, but until then, it would be in everyone’s interest to simply stop sending them money.

The Keurig is the Real America

It may sound odd, but the Keurig is the perfect indicator of the future of mankind.

A coffee machine?

As a society, we have been educated for over 50 years on the dangers of pollution and waste. Constantly inundated with books, articles, commercials, etc., we are all acutely aware of just how precious our resources are, and how we need to be frugal in our use of them, not only for the environment, but to leave something for future generations.

Of course, there are the dimwitted who can never be educated, and simply act in defiance of reason. You know the type: they don’t recycle, they still spray chemicals all over the lawn, they throw bottles out the window of their cars, and are generally considered to be moronic dickweeds. Unfortunately, there’s no helping those people, but we hope that the majority can at least act in a responsible manner.

Along comes the Keurig, a simple machine to create a single cup of coffee.

Utilizing a “pod”, a small, plastic-encased serving of coffee, this machine gives the user a chance to serve up a quick, poor-tasting cup of coffee in just seconds. Yes, it tastes like crap, because it brews too quickly, and it has that lovely flavor that only flexible, chemical-leeching plastic can provide. Once complete, the pod is tossed in to the trash bin to decompose over the next 1500 years.

What kind of idiot would use such an obviously environmentally damaging product? Everyone. And everyone has to be aware of the insidious nature of this device, yet they don’t care. There are very few of us even discussing it these days.

At least the inventor realizes what an incredibly crappy device he invented, and he is apologetic for what he has wrought. And he should be. Publicly stating that he is sorry just isn’t enough. He should be dedicating his life to establish a universal ban of this device. Otherwise, it’s just another example of empty, virtue signaling.

While we wait for Mr. Sylvan to grow a conscience, maybe we could start speaking with politicians and environmental leaders to actually bring this to the forefront. Bans rarely take effect, but a .50 deposit on every pod would end this disaster tomorrow.

Call your liberal candidates and start demanding that they take a public position on this subject. Unless they do, it simply won’t make it in to the news. The conservative candidates won’t touch it, and if they did, the liberal media would never give them the publicity for stating it, so it’s up the left to get this done.

You can also start in the office by putting up signs near the Keurig machine. Companies love to greenwash themselves, so here’s a perfect opportunity.

But it’s anti-business! Yes, some businesses should not be allowed. That’s why we have laws.

Throw your keurig machine in the trash (it probably can’t be recycled) and go out and get a real coffee maker and start feeling better about yourself and enjoying vastly better coffee.