Grotesque Cop Cars


We’ve all seen the latest versions of police cars now prowling the streets, those menacing looking Dodge Chargers and Ford Tauruses clad in black paint and matching black wheels. Not long ago, most police cars were rather attractive looking vehicles, primarily consisting of the venerable Ford Crown Victoria; a simple, reliable, cost effective car that didn’t look like something spawned from hell. A longtime favorite of the older crowd, it certainly didn’t terrify the public as it rolled through town.

As the Crown Vic has been discontinued, the new crop of cruisers seem to be split between the Taurus and the Charger. The Dodge Charger is an exceptionally hideous design to begin with, but when you throw black wheels on it, a bull bar and a black paint job, you get a vehicle that would make sweet ol’ Grandma stand back and raise her St. Christopher’s medal at it. Automotive design isn’t exactly on an inspiring trend towards splendor and enlightenment, but this one has all the beauty and personality of a mangled pit bull.

Not that the Ford Taurus is much better with its similar accouterments. The base design is certainly better than the Charger, but with the new “Apocalyptic” look being embraced by the automotive world, it really doesn’t matter. The result is the same: a dark, foreboding box on wheels that does nothing to put police in a positive light. Rather than calling it a “Police Interceptor”, they should go with “Public Oppressor”. Who wouldn’t see these vehicles as a threat?

Maybe these new police cars are an attempt to intimidate the public with scary looking cars in order to prepare us for an impending dystopian future. More likely, it’s just the overall trend of omnicrap in America and the embrace of the ugly and hideous.


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