Rumor has it that Gillette Stadium in Foxborough, MA, will be renamed “#MeToo Stadium” following the Super Bowl, in order to celebrate the company’s new focus on ending toxic masculinity and the corrosive patriarchy.
The company has also been rumored to have hired a Boston-based architectural firm to put a dome on Gillette Stadium that will perfectly resemble a pink, pussy hat, however, calls in to Patriot leadership to confirm this information have not been returned.
While some have been quick to see this new focus as possibly the dumbest ad campaign in American business history, one that will most likely see the over one hundred year-old company close its doors, there are a few that see it as pure genius:
“I think its great. Men are nothing but savage beasts that need to be beaten and put in p$### hats,” commented Pat Johansen on Twitter.
“My wife told me this was great. Her boyfriend agreed, and damn it, so do I.” said Chad Terrel of Gloucester, MA.
“Men @#$@# @#$ @#, and I can’t wait to %^%^ #!! them all! I still can’t support Gillette though, because I don’t shave and they’re still a #$% capitalist pig company that exploits its workers, degrades womyn, and is full of racist nazis”, said Zee Hostile, leader of the extreme leftist, feminist group, HairyPies.
From a business perspective, this new direction is difficult to understand for most, but the new leaders of business that have been promoted, not for achievement, but rather to meet diversity milestones, are now running businesses all across this country. And the results are not inspiring.
Gillette Stadium is the home of the NFL’s most successful franchise, so the Gillette name on the stadium should mean an endorsement of football, and of its primarily male fan base, however, it appears more likely that they’re really saying “#@$% you” to the male majority of Patriot Nation.
If that is their intent, they have done it brilliantly.